I decided to try my hand at poetry about the recent court-mandated toy I got installed in my car.  Various poetic meters are used.  Enjoy. 

50 miles I had to drive,

Waking up just at sunrise,

While the sun destroyed my bloodshot eyes.

(Asshole Cat had me up till 5.)

Appointment at 8.

Late.

Where is this fucking place...

to help me fill my court mandate?

(My car's required to breathalyze,

So I don't drive home hand on eye,

and get another DUI.)

It's called an interlock device,

Kiss goodbye my dating life.

******

Next morning at school,

in the Commuter Lot,

people stalk me with cars,

back to my parking spot.

Everyone's mad,

and no one can park,

There's gridlock in Blacksburg,

cuz my car won't start.

I turn on the car,

I huff and I puff,

But it takes me four minutes,

to fire that bitch up.

Retests while driving,

are part of the fun,

Unless you didn't notice,

that the retest's begun.

Missed one this morning,

and to my delight,

my car started honking,

and flashing it's lights.

"That won't get old,"

I said in my head,

once I got it restarted,

with the manual I read.

It's mine for a year,

so more stories I'll write,

but that's all for now,

that's it for tonight.