"The Plan"
for my short term future

Recently everyone has been asking what I'm going to do after I graduate. This page addresses that once and for all.

You remember in elementary (this probably applies much more to boys) when someone would start the series of questions of "What would you do for a million dollars?" and it would usually involve eating somebody's poo or banging out the lunch lady? What if the answer to 'what would you do for a million dollars' was to work 80 hours a week for 30 years. That's it. That's all you have to do. I, my friends, would rather eat the pile of poo.

The East Coast Drive

Something I've discovered, mainly from looking at my parents, is the theory of the "East Coast Career" mentality. Almost everyone I know has swallowed it without even knowing, and I'm going to make you regurgitate it for examination. East Coast parents breed their children for success. Starting in elementary, most parents demand superb grades from their children. Why? Because they want you to develop good study habits for highschool. Why? So that their kids can get in the best University possibly. WHY? So that when they get out, they can have a high paying job and be successful. Let me take a guess. When you were in school (especially highschool) both of your parents worked. Remember how stressed out your mom was when she came home to make dinner every night? You practically never saw your dad because he worked so late. WHY? So your family could be more financially successful.

The underlying principle of the "East Coast Career" mentality is that success is measured in financial terms. Your parents have force-fed you this since birth, and you never realized it. So what is success? It's the way other people measure your life. When you decide how much you like your life, you measure by how happy you are. So what makes you happy? This is different for everyone. If money makes you happy, then perhaps the East Coast Career is for you. Get a job with a huge company, work 50 hours a week and sit in a cubicle for 15 years until you get promoted to management, then enjoy a comfy corner office for another 15 years until you retire and can finally afford the BMW and boat you always wanted. Hell you'll be 60 with plenty of time to enjoy it. Those last 30 years? You won't even realize they just slipped away because everyone around you is doing the same thing. Tomorrow you're going to walk out of your office and realize you have gray hair and kids. Welcome to Northern Virginia.

It used to blow my mind when I went down to Nags Head and hung out with windsurfers who had given up stressful high-paying jobs to just go to the beach, work at a shithole, and just chill out. I didn't understand the concept, but now I do. From my parents I get the same reaction as telling them that 2+4 = blue. It just doesn't make sense, because you're not making more money than you spend.

Check out exhibit A, two away messages I got off a friend last month.

My Alternative

I've never been really huge on having a ton of money, as long as I have enough. I don't think money is happiness, I think money is freedom. If you have enough money, you're free to do whatever you want. That's the tricky part of it, you only need "enough." So would I go up to Northern Virginia and let myself be treated like a wrung on everyone else's corporate ladder? Not for a million dollars. More specifically, not for the $72k I was offered. There's no way I'm going back to Northern Virginia. I'm throwing in the towel and waving the white flag. Take it, it's yours.

I've found 3 better places to live, by the process of elimination:

I chose Phoenix. More Specifically, Tempe, AZ.

Jobs are a lot like relationships with women. You don't have to take the first one that comes your way. For it to work, you have to like them, and they have to like you. There will be jobs where you have to put up with a lot of shit you don't want to, but most of the time even these have their rewards....And eventually you want to settle down for the rest of your life with the one you love.

Which leads to the second question everyone asks me after I tell them where I'm going after I graduate, "Did you get a job out there?" The answer is no. The last thing I want to do is run from college straight into a career. I'm going to fuck around for a while, working at like starbucks or a gym.....somewhere I don't have to use my brain at all. It's tired after these long 8 years. I'm going to hate my job, and I've come to terms with this. Any way you cut it, working sucks; that's why they pay you to do it. So after I slowly ease into the cold pool of employment in a city I love, I'll realize that as long as I'm going to work, I might as well get paid a lot for it. So with my great degree(s), I'm going to make as much as possible, doing as little as possible. That's my version of "enough." And if you ever run out of sand or scorpions, feel free to visit.